3.25.11 [moving on]

I’ve officially listened to Rascal Flatts “I’m moving on” on repeat for over an hour now. And if you know me you won’t be surprised to know I’ve also been crying that entire time as well. Moving on is one of the things I think we as people resist the most. Who wants to let go of the things they know, the places we are familiar with and the people we are acquainted with for the unknown? Who wants to let go of the things we have invested ourselves into. Whether it is that person we’ve been holding onto for years, or a place we’ve stayed in for too long. . . Finding the strength to identify that where are is not where we should be, and then making a change, is a difficult thing.

That’s where I’ve found myself this past week – looking at my life, and wondering why the heck I’m still in Shepherdstown West Virginia. I’ve been here for 21 years of my life and this place really holds everything that I am. My best memories happened here, but as the past few years have gone by, also my worst. My family is here, and also some of my closest friends. But there are also the memories of things that I want to leave in my past, and that is why I’m making the choice to just leave everything and get out of here.

Looks like I’m really getting on a plane April 1st and saying goodbye to Shepherdstown and Shepherd University. . . This is definitely a bittersweet thing, there are those that I will miss dearly, but also those that I know are toxic in my life and I need to find a new environment. To those that I love, I hate to go, I’ll miss you constantly, and I thank you for all that you’ve contributed to my life. To those that I am leaving behind as a part of the painful past- you’ve made sure that I couldn’t forget my mistakes, and held me back quite long enough.

Arizona is going to provide me with new opportunities, new people, and new choices to make. I pray that when I arrive I can take this opportunity to find out who I am, and where I want to go in my life.

I definitely wish you all the best. Take care. . .

Emma

Don't dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer.
Denis Waitley